Am Moving!! hahaha!

I have created a new blog & gonna abandon this and focus on that =) Feel free to follow & visit http://theeyesofxw.blogspot.com =) Jan 24,2013 -CXW-

HOW? lol...

SO much to say, but how to say??

Coincidence!

LOL... right after i have my previous post posted, i went to read my friend's recent post and find out, oopss! it just matches my previous post~ hmmmmmm

Tense?!

It has been few months that I haven't been having good sleep... and have been in a very tense mode~ Those who know me well will feel surprised on how i can make it to not sleep at 8.30pm anymore~ I am amazed too~ lol~

The moment when i feel like giving up, what urge me the most is, "If i give up this chance, I would not be able to reach my dream destination." So, no matter how hard it is to try to keep myself awake and get most of the "never-ending" revision and assignments done, I only know that, I must persevere~


I hope all these sleepless moment can exchange for a good result... and of course, I must hold on and believe that God's second chance to me should be well kept by myself with His great help!

Take care as i am taking care of myself too~! :)

XW

A good slap or not?!

Should i say that it's a good slap on your face or should i pity and feel for u? That's my question after reading a blog entry that i know it is about u.... i chose not to comment because i would have bias... wondering how are you coping with that hard time now~

助人为快乐之本

The above title is a Chinese saying that simply means being able to help others is a source of happiness.

To contribute to the community, my higher institute organized a 2-day SPM seminar for English& BM and I helped out there.

It has just ended. And, after all, if I choose to be negative, I could say, IT'S TIRING! just that... However, to look at the bright side, I should be happy to be able to be part of it, at least one of the few contribution to the school~ :)

Anyhow, giving it's not just about giving! I can ensure you that, it doesn't just stop there. It does continue with 'gaining'. :)

So, start giving!! The more you give/ help, the more meaningful your life is ;)

Cheers& God bless!
XW

Speechlessness that leads to laughter~

Recently, I am trying to help out a depressed friend. In fact, it has been quite a long while now. This time, I lent her a book called 'Purpose Driven Life.' She then accepted the offer reluctantly.

However, few days later, I received from her a text message saying that she is sorry and she doesn't want to read the book. She doesn't think it helps although she admittedly says that it conveys the positives. *alright! Here is the funny part... She continued with,

'The reality is I don't even know how to DRIVE,I can't live independently. Can't go where I want to go, and no one wants to fetch me to where I want to go.'

To be frank, I do not know how to react to this AT ALL. I just laughed to myself unintentionally~

What do I really want to convey here? It's actually that, I am saddened by the fact that she is so helpless and she knows that but she gives up so easily without giving herself a help, a try, for ONE MORE time!!

Ok! I can't guarantee and do not even have the mind that she will be recovered fully right after finished reading the book! Really~ but, at least something to do to keep her busy and at the same time , being showered with positive thing than gossips and the unnecessaries or whatever that might make her feel even more depressed!

Anyhow, is this a type of personality one who is depressed cultivates!? And, what can be done practically other than prayers to help such bunch ?

Something to ponder upon~ :)

Take care all!! ;)
God bless~

XW

When 'give up' is necessary~

Sometimes, it's just wise to not hang on to something which we know would bring harmful effect either to our history, present and the future. However, why is it so difficult to let go? I would only say, because of being overly pig-headed~ when we finally manage to get on, we would find out that we should have done so earlier! :) Hopefully, i can be considered as having reached that 'destination'!!

May God be our constant Guide. Stay humble and we shall see things even wider and farther, not being short-sighted :)

Take care!! ;)

Excited!

I really can't wait for lots of things at the moment....

1. Mid year to be over.... (9 more papers to go)

2. Bro's return (quite miss his stupiak face actually)

3. FAITH CONFERENCE!!!! (am sure it's going to be a highlight in my life)

4. Mid year holiday (i really need FRESH AIR... phewww~~)

5. The FLU to go awayyy~~ (it's making me feel so down and cant concentrate... It's exam oK!? pleaseee :D HAHAHAA)

6. to meet up with some "long-time-no-see" friends.... MANY OF THEM next weekk!!

Anyhow, this whole week, gonna be really busy with all the exam preparation as always but, at the same time, not forgetting to prepare myself with prayers for the upcoming Faith Conference!!!!!! Can't wait to see God's miraculous,wondrous works!! We will not be the same anymore after that!! :)

God bless~

XW

Are we aware??! Slavery....

Since the beginning of this year, I've come across this "kind-of-long" ad of CNN regarding the "Freedom Project". I was quite impressed when one of the CNN 's representative said " Enough! It's Enough!" At first, i found it cool ONLY...

As i watched further today about the "Freedom Project," I'm even more impressed! To be short, it's actually a project to enhance the ending of SLAVERY! yes! you didn't see the wrong word... it's "SLAVERY"!

Since young, unless having read from the Bible stories, "slavery" isn't close to me AT ALL! To me, even my ex-maid (one and only since baby), is living so so so relaxingly being provided of shelter,personal television,food and anything! I've forgotten that slavery still does exist. I know it, just forgotten. "How could I?" you might ask. Simple enough... because of "CARELESSNESS"

Anyhow, the point of this entry is actually to remind you guys the existence of slavery, just in case you have forgotten JUST LIKE me... Be reminded that you are living a life better off than the SLAVES since you are able to switch on your PC, surf freely on the net, and read this, whereas, the SLAVES can't!yeap....

So, be grateful for the more-than-the-slave freedom you are having now! :)

God bless, my friends! Cheersss~

XW

"Be Serious!"

Being "serious" is something that is really close and "dear" to me in terms of friendship, relationship,and in reaching my target in studies especially. Just not when i am free from all the stress and pressure! I can play like a "stupid kid" :D However, one thing that I've been compromising somehow is the "spiritual life", my cell members' and even myself sometimes...

Today's sermon really struck me hard, pierced into my heart very hurtfully. To be frank, I've actually come to a point when i feel that i really can't control anything anymore that i would rather not care at all... I can be really ignorant of anything when i feel really tiring. When i don't use my brain, i really DONT use,even in God's work. I am guilty to have to say, i am not giving my 100% in ANYTHING that i'm doing.Be it ministry or studies. I feel very difficult at times when i have to ask myself," Should i just let it go or hold it tightly?" To top it up,i ask," Are my cell member's spiritual life what i should feel very stubborn about? As in, having to "force" them to attend cell group, attend church services, and make sure they serve in the cell group at least?!" And the most saddening part is when i came to realize that "exam" can really a big part of them that they decide to only attend cell group and even the church services AFTER exam! Don't i have exam as well? In addition, my workload this year is even greater. But yet, I'm willing to sacrifice my time to "host" the cell group and make sure their spiritual life is being cared of.

I can't help it but to surrender myself to the Lord once again this morning. I told the Lord what's in my heart as well as some important decisions and am sorry to be the one "pushing" him away since don't know when. And, i am asking and inviting Him "in" again! Again, i am reminded of my priority in life and who are the people and what are the things that i have to leave behind in order to be able to move on and GROW! :)

Will you just be encouraged and join me for being serious in such a serious matter?! If my cell member is so happened to be reading this which i think it's not so likely,i would say," i am praying hard for you " :)

Thank God for refreshing me !

God bless you all~! *haven't been writing much about my spiritual life before aye... but yea... i'm inspired to do so though it's not whatever that's fascinating! :D

Anyhow,cheerrss~

XW

Surprise-ful 2011's first 5 months! :D

I have chosen to view things optimistically ! Not for once... but often!! :D You have to respect that... LOL! nvm about that... just a stupid intro.... ==" by the way, what does it have to do with my title aye?!

In fact, am doing A-levels now and it has been 4 months already! and the 5th months has just begun! And in these 4++ months, i really thank God for leading me step by step till this very day... and mid year exam is approaching! Next monday :)

I haven't been updating myself for quite some time and below is a list of things that i can't keep and must give thanks to God and people who had been, have been, and are helping and supporting me all these while! :)

1. My SPM result is out. Again, i didn't get a really really bright or "chan ngan" result,but at least, it fulfill's the entry requirement of my current higher institute :) That's sufficient! :)

2. That i manage to overcome a lot of "patience" training at school esp. :) dealing with very difficult human beings... and some turn out to be friends with me... isn't that what the "salt" and "light" should be? and i thank God for that opportunity :)

3. Getting test results that never had i expected... overall, they are fine. :) i hope exams will be the same as well though the lecturers have been hinting us that it's much possible that our result will drop after the mid-year... :S grrrrr....

4. A special experience in the cell group... seeing a special kind of "growth" there... believe God is in control and can't wait to see more breakthrough!

5. Had a MINOR "bang" on someone's car... i would say it's a "good" start for my driving journey... i learn from the "silly" mistake and being EXTRA careful since then.... the minor is really minor.... Thank God!

.......MORE TO COME SOON!.........

can't wait for the Faith Conference to arrive!!!!!!! I desperately need a recharge!


as for now, better be well-prepared for the coming mid year exam!!!

Cheers and God bless!! ;)


XW

SO SO SO HEAVYYYY!!!!!!

Many things to celebrate, many things to be sad about... HOWWWWW????? the sad news cover up all the happiness.. what to do?????

i wish can share with you but seem like out of contact now... so difficult to reach u... :(

anyways, am feeling very heavy now. CNY is up but why is so many things are going so not smoothly? how to enjoy it??? I REALLY HAVE NO IDEA!

HOME

Hey Friends!

For the time being, I am still away from home and am in K.K. awaiting for my last paper of SPM to arrive. That hurts because I'm really missing home. Knowing so many of my friends and even my brother are going to be home within these few days even sucks! Hmmmm..... My turn, please come faster!!!!

Just the thought of missing home has inspired me even more on writing about HOME. Home was definitely something that I took for granted before this. Probably because I wasn't OUT from it all by myself before, that's why, now, then I feel the importance of cherishing it when I'm INSIDE of it. Hopefully it's not too late. I hope this "fire" is not going to burn out as soon as I arrive home. :D

Tell you guys what! Even in English paper 1 for SPM for this year, HOME was one of the essay topics. I was really shocked when I saw it. Of course, I chose that topic to write! LOL...

... to be continued... shall write more when I get home! Countdown 8 more days!!!!!!

XW

Interesting?!

unnoticingly, it's been two weeks that i am in KK ...
was terribly homesick the first week and am recovering from that now...
oh weLL!i fell sick this week due to not enough rest because was a bit stressed out and cant sleep == yeah... but recovering a lot since yesterday after few rounds of sleep!! :)

on Monday was the BM exam... that was the one subject that i was really worried about! and the night before was a bit down... somehow, when the 2nd paper comes, i saw the rumusan topic--- "Kebaikan pengambilan coklat", straighaway mood returns! LOL... never did i expect that SPM will have this kind of interesting topic and of course, my handy topic :D

the next day was English... was a lil' relaxing compared to the BM.Not because my english is a lil' better, but i just don feel that bad .. yea :D hopefully can pass at least...

SEJARAH=HISTORY!!! if pass, i shall be too happy till "lot nga" o! :D

anyways, today finally can rest a lil' then have to start with reviewing science already... which will be happening next thurs! maths on Monday and the next day, Moral... !! :)

all the best to you all and happy holiday to many!!! :D

XW

SPM Trial tests

Yesterday, i sat the very first trial test for SPM. BM paper 1 ( 2 essays )and i personally think that it's a very " dangerous " mark i got. On the other hand,i am surprised about how did i even managed to start penning. I have another paper to go for BM next thurs.

Oct31,2010 will be my BK trial test.

Results of this trial will be set as my forecast results. SO, 5 credits needed!!! I MUST DO IT!!!!

Your prayers are very much cherished and appreaciated! thanks!!! :)

XW

Papers...

what a night on facebook updating about me being a victim == sorry trees and jungles... sigh~

btw, a comment about my previous blog post. a thought of me after a drink with a best friend. and it's a never-ending topic - FRIENDS

Cheers~

XW

Friends?

What's friend? No man is an island. Well- said!! BUT... does everyone have friend or even need a friend?

"What type of friend are you talking about? " is a good question!

let me answer you with my personal opinion. you might have close friends whom you can pour your heart to, or at least, the friendship is still going on. Next,holiday friends! who hang out like "earth" with you, just for that semester break or year-end holiday. after that,they will avoid picking up your phone or else,they will only look for you when they need your help. Another type of friends are Facebook friends, a.k.a. online friends. Probably you have never seen the real person. However,miraculously, you can talk to them about Anything and EVERYTHING. Next are the Hi-bye friends! Obviously, they are those that you said hi and then BYE!Last but not least, are the type of friends whom, because they like your friend, so befriend with you because you are very good friend of the friend whom that first friend i mentioned like (i know it's a lil' confusing here, BUT it's a reality).

no matter what kind of friend you are to your friend, i don care. but, all i know is, if you are a genuine friend, you will have some other genuine friends to be your friend. If you are those faky type of friend, beware! cz you are with other faky friends NOW!!!!! ( accept this fact )

i can tell, i do have a list in my mind who are the real and fake friends. and probably you do have a list as well! so do everyone! after so many experiences about different kind of friendship, some really gave me hope that there's still real friend on this PlANET! however, i really don mind anything about the fake friendship anymore. :)

cherish is what we all have to learn to maintain a friendship. ;)

XW

Birthday!?

ok .... this year's have passed for more than a week. but surprisingly, something is still going on ... LOL...i will post up the pics of the pressies and stuff on FB when i go on FB during early Nov :)

frankly speaking, this year's din really sound happening because MOST close friends were not in town. ON the other hand, it's and was happening because MOST close friends come back and celebrate with me again plus some did something for me... really thanks to those who actually tried planning something for me. Compliments will be given on FB photos in the captions as well ;)

the most fun time i had ON that day itself was video chatting with a MS.MS-opo whole afternoon and had loads of fun listening to "atmosphere-ful song" found by her :D really donno where on earth she could do it... :S thanksthanks and honestly, so happy very much xia;) don an shuang a :P

Due to having tuition that night, i could only go to dinner with parents ( this year without bro :'( ) the next day with 2 other "special" ppl (adults)at farfalle :) LOL... oh ya! the sat before my b'day, also went to "celebrate" at dreamland for cheese baked crabby *someone treated... NIce~

today! Kristen,Corzin,and Colleen "celebrated" with me at Perdana Club. While we were still at church,I put my stuff in Corzin's bag. When wanna help her carry cz guilty for making her bag so heavy, she don't let. got SECRET wa.... :P lol...Actually, my presents from them were inside. Had a great time there! still the same crazy us. keke...

still hoping to meet up with so many friends who came back for KL and Singapore... LOL!hopefully, pics can be ready as soon as poss :)

oh ya! thanks for the SMSes i got! Those who texted me midnight, you are the DEAREST TO ME :D Love ya'll lots!

and thanks for wishing me all the best in my SPM. that's the highlight of this year i suppose. and that's what make me feel so stressed up and sometimes pissed off.However, i really hope i won disappoint my parents esp and u all out there supporting me emotionally ...:)

don't know what to say other than THOUSAND THANKS! grateful to the Lord for YOU ALL !

XW

23.08.2010

What a night witnessing the bloody happening in Manila, Philippines through both CNN as well as the Phoneix channels for 3 hours. In fact, the whole thing had happened for around 10 hours.

A lot of things can be discussed about this happening. Be it the actions and plans taken by the Philippines security department, or the reason that had stirred this gunman's emotions to do such a bloody thing, or whatever you can ever discussed. However, my personal feeling or opinion towards this sad case is purely SAD.

Hearing the sounds of the bullet shots, the screams by the hostages, the news that the bus drive said ( that all 15 hostages were dead )which is not true, looking at how the policemen did the rescue which were not so professional were all that made me feel sorry and nervous for the hostages. GRRRRRR.....

Let me just point out one thing that really silenced the room when my parents and i watched was during the time when the reporter said that the bus driver told them about all the 15 were dead. Couple of minutes after that, the policemen began their actions. While they were breaking the mirrors of the back,front and the right side, it was so so so quiet ( no sound heard made from the bus ). At this point, we were like, " SO, REALLY ALL DEAD!? " I made a prayer in my heart that,LORD, PLEASE PROTECT THEM!! because it was LIVE, so, i prayed... yea...

After all the hardworks of the policemen, the gunman was shot dead (didn't manage to see how it was done == ), bullet shot right on the head and left hanging on the door. I can see blood spilling out from his head... yucks!!! and the policeman started to check in the bus and see wassup inside.

THEN, the first hostage came out (the first of the 15), i was already clapping. HOORAY!... Not sure if u get my feeling. but that was it! and more and more were out of the bus. Of course, when the news was updated and came to know that there were 6 dead ( last night, but the latest news i got was increased to 9 dead ), i felt really sad and sorry for them.

phew~~ anyways, may my condolences go to the victims...

A day witnessing this tragedy.